"You can buy a goldfish."
I jumped and clapped like a monkey. Big smile appeared on my face. I knew that if I raised a pet, I would be responsible. I didn't know that it would be that hard to raise goldfish.
I bought four goldfish . They danced up and down and sometimes flipped gently. I watched them carefully and fed them once a day. When I fed them, they swam up fought with each other with their fins to eat more than their friends. They looked so cute when they did that. When time went by,we became closer friends.
Then I got some problems.One day, I went home exhausted. I totaly forgot about my goldfish and fell into bed like a dead bear. The next day,I saw one of my goldfish floating in the water. And after that day,the bother three died too.I cried for ten minutes and I couldn't sleep. It was my saddest birthday ever.
Alex,
ReplyDeleteWhat a great narration (I am sorry about your gold fish, though). Your story showed solid structure and progression of ideas. Your message was clear and your writing showed good fluency, albeit minor errors. Please watch out for spelling mistakes.